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Why Isn't the Law of Attraction Working For Me? Part 1

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Since the vastly popular movie, The Secret burst onto the scene a few years ago, millions of people everywhere have been trying to figure out how to use this “Law of Attraction” thing to manifest more prosperity, love and success into their lives. Many watched Oprah’s shows featuring several individuals who used this “Law” to totally transform their lives. The problem was that many of these viewers became frustrated when it they couldn’t figure out how to use the Law of Attraction and did not have the same results as those featured in the movie and on Oprah. Ultimately many dismissed it as just “wishful thinking.”

What most seekers don’t understand is that they are already using the Law of Attraction. Unfortunately, most are using it unconsciously and attracting everything they don’t want. Even techniques taught in The Secret (like repeating positive affirmations and visualizing prosperity) don’t seem to be bringing people the prosperity, success, or love that they really want. Is this happening to you?

Or, maybe you’ve got the Law of Attraction thing down. You understand how it works and have perhaps manifested some small blessing in your life. Still, you wonder why you keep experiencing the same challenges over and over in that “problematic” area of your life. Let’s explore why that might be, and learn how you can utilize this powerful force to attract what you do want…in every area of your life.

In science, the law of attraction refers to a chemical affinity or a physical condition where “like attracts like.” Not unlike the laws of physical science, the law of attraction is very real and works in our experience exactly the same way. How? Well, because the universe is fundamentally energy. We are, therefore, fundamentally energy and our thoughts are fundamentally energy. Our predominate thoughts and our “emotionally charged” thoughts actually emit frequencies science can measure. These frequencies attract like experience in our outer world. It’s all energy. One is the inner, the other is the outer.

You are, therefore, attracting to yourself in physical experience the vibrational equivalent of your beliefs. Your present “reality” is comprised of your beliefs “in form.”

There’s a catch here however. Something most who teach about the Law of Attraction don’t talk about …

There is not sufficient energy in your occasional beliefs, your repeated affirmations, or what you are picturing during visualization to manifest as form in your experience. There simply isn’t. What does have the energy to manifest are your deeply held beliefs…and they do. You are attracting into your life experiences and conditions that match your deeply held “core beliefs.” Techniques such as repeating positive affirmations or visualization do not, on their own, transform these core beliefs.

What do I mean by deeply held core beliefs? I mean your personal world view — which you keep alive by your attitudes and perceptions as you interact with the world. Some examples might be: “The only truly wealthy people are those born into it.” Or, “It’s only who you know that matters.” Or, “The older you get the harder it is to find true love.” Or, “You’ve got to be really smart or clever to earn lots of money (and I’m not).” Or, “All good things come to an end.” These are not conscious beliefs, mind you. They live in the dark recesses of your subconscious.

Compounding the problem is that we live in a world that continually tells us we are limited, that there’s not enough to go around and that we are victims of fate and at the mercy of an unkind world.

Discovering and transforming these limiting core beliefs is absolutely essential if you want to manifest a more expansive and abundant life. The good news is that you can do it. This is totally in your power. The reality is that it takes some work. However, I’ve come up with a 3-step plan that will make that “work” a little easier…and very effective.

Join me next Monday when I detail my 3 step plan . Until then, start looking at what has been manifesting in your life up till now, and know that it is indeed a reflection of your core beliefs.

Really Nice Things Friends Have Said…

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I asked some good friends of mine to comment on my Manifest Your Desires Program and here’s what they said…

“As an author and coach myself, I can tell you that Victoria’s program is absolutely transformational. She’s a master manifestor and knows the secrets for manifesting your heart’s desires. I’ve known her for over ten years, and she’s the real deal!” –Chellie Campbell, author of  The Wealthy Spirit and Zero to Zillionaire.

“Victoria’s program is beautifully transformational. She’s a master at identifying and eliminating negative core beliefs — with the most beautiful life and personal experience to back up what she teaches. Through this program, Victoria will be your spiritual mentor in your path to peace and abundance.” -Linda Sivertsen, NYT best-selling co-author of Harmonic Wealth

Gotta love friends like this.  They both are amazing women themselves and have terrific programs of their own. Check out Chellie’s website http://www.Chellie.com for her Wealthy Spirit newsletter, and Dophin Club.  And Linda’s site, http://www.dreamitgreen.comfor all her cool environmental awareness and workshops on how to get published. 

 

Desire as the Natural Process of an Expanding Universe

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Fulfillment of our true desires is a natural process, it is how the universe operates. The universe is constantly expanding. There are new forms of life being created and expressed every day. Galaxies are formed, flowers bloom, trees bear fruit and babies are born. It is the nature of the Universe to come to fruition – to expand and express itself. We take it for granted.

Consider a rose bush. It doesn’t need to struggle to create blossoms. It doesn’t worry that it won’t bloom. It doesn’t question whether it’s worthy of such beauty. It doesn’t feel it’s lucky. It just blooms. The essential nature of the rose bush is to express its glory and magnificence. This is the fulfillment of its true desire. True desires are intended to be fulfilled!

What’s truly remarkable is that the seed of a rose contains all the elements necessary to become a rose bush resplendent with beautiful blossoms. It only needs the nurturing of soil and water. The rose seed is the rose bush in potentiality. Our desires are similar to the rose seed, because inherent in having a desire, is everything necessary for its fulfillment. It only needs a little nurturing.

Your desires are a potentiality waiting for your permission to be released into actuality.

Desire is, in fact, the first step in the manifestation process. We would have never accomplished anything in life if we lacked desire. We would never have planted crops, built houses, created cities, founded or attended schools, written books, sewed clothes, cut our hair or even taken a bath without first desiring something that was not in existence at that moment. Desire is the starting point for everything. It is essential to growth and evolution.

Let me clarify that I’m speaking about your heart’s desires here, not passing fancies or physical urges. Your true desires are those which have been tugging on your heart for some time. It is the yearning, deep within you, to expand into a greater expression and enjoy a more glorious, love-filled, abundant, creative and fulfilling life. In fact, we could define true desire as an invitation from your inner wisdom to express your potential — to be more than you thought you ever could be.

So, what are your heart’s desires? Could it be a fulfilling career; a youthful and healthy body; finding your “soul-mate;” living in a beautiful and harmonious environment; a wildly successful new business; that job you always wanted; unshakable peace of mind; boundless abundance; or the expression of some latent talent? Maybe it’s all of the above. Maybe your true desires have yet to be identified. You only know that you desire something greater than your current experience. Whatever your dream may be, it is meant for you to have and experience. As long as your desires do no harm to yourself or anyone else, they are your inner self urging you forward — urging you into the magnificent life you were meant to live!

So. we want to welcome our heart’s desires and encourage them to emerge from the dream-state and express in reality — not wishing, not dreaming, but consciously inviting our desires to naturally blossom from their seed. The key is to consciously invite them.

When we consciously accept this natural blossoming process, we are taking the first step in the manifestation process.

Relax Around the Effort

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One of the concepts articulated in this morning’s yoga class was: “Relax around the effort.” Of course, that’s what yoga is really all about isn’t it? I’ve not done yoga for that long, but I get that if you huff and puff and strain to get into, or to hold a pose, then you’re missing the point. Although effort is definately necessary, I think the point is to gently approach the pose and then breathe during the holding of the pose and relax into (as best as possible) the experince of it. Easier said than done, I know. But having your intention there is what counts, and it gets easier over time, right?

Well, I started thinking about how much I do not relax around the effort I expend in other areas of my life (particularly work.)  And, how much I would like to set my intention to begin relaxing around the effort it every area.  Again, effort in life is necessary, otherwise we’d turn into big couch potato blobs. Effort is a good thing…but getting stressed and pissing, moaning and groaning around the effort is…counterproductive, eh? 

So, this week I’m going to write on my big bulletin board posted in front of my desk the phrase, Relax around the effort. I’m going to set my intention and see how often I am able to remember to breathe, relax and let the energy move through me…being conscious of where I might be straining, and why.

I invite you to do this with me this week, and report back (in a relaxed, non-stressful kind of way.)   I don’t know, but I’m guessing all our efforts we be much more productive and we’ll be more relaxed and happier people by the end of the week.

Many blessings.

A Lesson in Manifestation from Nature

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Like most Southern California natives, I thought I knew what spring was. It’s when the leaves come back on those few deciduous trees, and it starts to get hot again around February. Ha! I had no idea. I had no clue! Have you ever experience a friend describing events in detail, but you can’t really picture it until you experience it first hand? Well, when I moved to the cold Northeast this last winter (shivering and wondering why there were so many dead trees everywhere) people kept telling me to “Hold on, the spring here is magnificent!”

Okay, now I get it. I’ve never really experienced a real spring before. What a fabulous season! The variety of blossoms and the sweet aroma in the air is indescribable. Everywhere I look, I’m amazed at Mother Nature’s color palette: pale pinks, bright pinks, lavender, yellows and white mixed with the bright, light green of tender new leaves. It’s what inspired the Impressionists.

And it’s interesting that many East coast natives don’t really notice it anymore. They tend to talk about the bugs and the pollen. Yes, that’s here too, but I’m so bowled over by the beauty, I haven’t been paying attention. I hope I never become inured to the splendor.

So it was just such a spring morning, when walking my dog through the woods that the rebirth process of nature struck me on a whole new level. These trees that appeared so lifeless, so dead, were now pregnant with thousands of tiny buds. It got my full attention. They had something to teach me about the process of manifestation. Here goes…

Many have an area of our lives that, appears on the surface, dead. Maybe you’ve worked really hard to bring something good to life in your world…with no success. Perhaps you keep trying and trying, becoming frustrated with each failed attempt. Maybe you’ve given up and are pretending to tolerate an unfulfilling life. Perhaps you’ve rationalized away your desire for a more joyous and fulfilling life. I know I’ve done that with certain areas of my life.

If so, join with me in turning to nature to see if we can’t mimic its miraculous process of rebirth.

If an alien (or a Southern Californian, for that matter) landed on this planet in the middle of winter anywhere in the Northern hemisphere he would see, with the exception of the evergreens, nothing but dead trees and bushy sticks growing out of the ground. He would see frozen ground and think, “there’s no life growing here.” But we Earthlings know that nothing could be further from the truth. If he waits a few months, he’ll witness a miracle of transformation. Around March, April or May strange pods begin to develop on all the branches seemingly overnight. As the planet warms up and rain showers down, these pods begin to open up and tender new forms of life express themselves. In a few days or weeks, brilliant colors and diverse shapes burst forth. Once bare and lifeless branches are transformed into living aroma-producing, bird-housing, shade-providing wonders of nature.

Just as the trees and bushes now express their potential, our heart’s desires, which may appear lifeless now, can be nurtured to blossom and express our life’s potential. What’s the secret?…

Two forces: Sun and rain. Well, metaphorically, of course. As the sun warms up the tree trunks, and rain nourishes the soil which allows the life energy to flow, we can add “sun” and “rain” to our desires to allow life energy to flow. Spend some time in nature this week as you reflect on the following two ideas.

1. Love: We can think of “sun” as love. Do you know how you feel when you’re relaxing in the warm sun at the beach on a summer day? You’re relaxed. As long as you’ve applied protective sun screen, the sun feels healing to your body and your worries are miles away. Life is good and you feel great. It’s that feeling you want to apply to your heart’s desires. You want to get into that feeling space of loving your self and your life…of knowing that all is right with the world. Meditation is a good place to start with this. So is visualization. Whatever gets you connected with your Source and allows your mind to “live in the possibility” of your desires fulfilled, is a good practice. Spend time each day actively loving your self, your talents, your uniqueness and the gift you bring to the world. You are a magnificent expression of life…even more glorious than a pear tree in full blossom. Radiate warm love into your desires. Remember that, just like the natural rebirthing process of spring, the fulfillment of your desires is a natural process. Just as a tree is meant to blossom in the spring, you are meant to realize your potential. Consciously love your desires into manifestation.

2. The element of “rain” has two components…affirmation and action.

Affirmation: Similar to the way in which rain nourishes the soil which feeds plants and trees, positive affirmations nourish your soul and your heart’s desires. Structure your affirmations such that they first affirm the truth that you are connected with the Source, followed by a statement of the absolute truth about you. Repeating affirmations should not be about “countering” some current experience. Their purpose should be to remind you of your innate wholeness, and call forth your divine right to a fulfilling, joyous, successful and prosperous life. For example, if I were affirming financial prosperity, I might say something along the lines of: “Because I am a unique expression of Universal limitless good, I am now infinitely abundant, prosperous and free, as I was created to be.” Repeat positive affirmation throughout your day…upon rising, before falling off to sleep, while waiting in line, driving in traffic, and each time your mind starts to drift into fear and doubt. Remember that you are “nourishing” the soil of your mind and soul which feeds your belief…and therefore your experience in life.

Action: it is a fact of nature that the right amount of rain nourishes life and supports the growth of all good things. Too much in one place and destructive floods occur. Too little rain and living things wither and die. We can think of our daily activity in this way. In order to support the manifestation of your heart’s desires, you need to take action. Too little action and the manifestation withers and dies. Too much action and you’ll be carried away by a flood of overwhelm. By “too much action” I mean running around trying to make things happen without being connected to the Source of intuitive wisdom that would guide you into effective action. Again, I stress the importance of first connecting with Source through meditation, quiet journaling or other such practice that aligns you with your inner intuition. Through this practice you will open yourself to an inner wisdom and be guided as to what exactly you need to do in the physical world to support the realization of your dreams. As you take action, affirm your talents and capabilities as well as the fact that the universe loves and supports you. Action, taken in this way then becomes focused, empowered and purposeful, instead of exhausting and stressful.

So again, take some time this week to connect with nature. Take a walk in the mountains, along the beach, in the woods, or the desert in bloom. As you do, contemplate these ideas and make them your own. Then, come back, get ready, and get going.

Many blessings.

Sayings of the Jewish Buddha

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When jokes this good get passed along on the internet, you wish the orginal source would remain included, so that it can be attributed to the brilliant person who originated it. But alas, it’s often not included. However, it’s too funny not to post. And may the orginator stand up.  Enjoy…

“If there is no self, whose arthritis is this?

Be here now. Be someplace else later. Is that so complicated?

Drink tea and nourish life; with the first sip, joy; with the second sip, satisfaction; with the third sip, peace; with the fourth, a Danish.

Wherever you go, there you are. Your luggage is another story.

Accept misfortune as a blessing. Do not wish for perfect health, or a life without problems. What would you talk about?

The journey of a thousand miles begins with a single Oy.

There is no escaping karma. In a previous life, you never called, you never wrote, you never visited. And whose fault was that?

Zen is not easy. It takes effort to attain nothingness. And then what do you have? Bupkis.

The Tao does not speak. The Tao does not blame. The Tao does not take sides. The Tao has no expectations. The Tao demands nothing of others. The Tao is not Jewish.

Breathe in. Breathe out. Breathe in. Breathe out. Forget this and attaining Enlightenment will be the least of your problems.

Let your mind be as a floating cloud. Let your stillness be as a wooded glen. And sit up straight. You’ll never meet the Buddha with such rounded shoulders.

Deep inside you are ten thousand flowers. Each flower blossoms ten thousand times. Each blossom has ten thousand petals. You might want to see a specialist.

Be aware of your body. Be aware of your perceptions. Keep in mind that not every physical sensation is a symptom of a terminal illness.

The Torah says, Love your neighbor as yourself. The Buddha says, There is no self. So … maybe we’re off the hook?”

3 Steps to Awaken Your Truth While Nurturing Your Baby

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whisper-in-mamas-earWhether you’ve given birth or have adopted a newborn, raising that baby is a terrific time to remember that we are all connected. It’s a great time to remember that we are so much more than a physical body…that we are indeed “spirits living in the material world” (as Sting’s song reminds us.) It’s a terrific time to remember that there is a higher power that binds us together…that guides and governs all of creation…that shines through our eyes…that responds to our thought and what we say about ourselves.

Indeed we are all connected on the invisible side of life. We must be. It doesn’t matter if it’s a tree or a flower…a bird, or a human being. It’s all one Life Energy expressing in different forms. This awareness becomes intensified when you have a baby. It becomes so clear that your newborn is more than a cute little physical body. In those moments when your baby is awake and alert, you notice a light shining from behind her eyes and you can feel the connection…soul to soul. And the first time he smiles, you know that that love could…just maybe…erase all the wrongs in the world.

You might also feel totally responsible for not only taking care of your baby’s physical needs, but also his or her emotional needs. You begin to think about the responsibility you have in shaping who he or she becomes. Yes, I know, a lot of it is nature and temperament. I’ve got twins so I know first hand how different they can be…even when you do the exact same things with both babies. Still, a large part of the equation is nurture. Their level of self-esteem, their social skills, their learning capacity and how they feel about themselves can all be affected by what you, as a parent (and “a god” in your child’s eyes) do…or don’t do.

That’s why bonding is so important to a baby’s development. When a baby feels the connection with you, your unconditional love and your willingness to be fully present with him or her, a baby develops into an emotionally healthy, happy child with high self-esteem and is able to form healthy relationships with others easily.

Also, what you believe to be true about your baby, and what you say to her has an enormous impact on who she will become. One of the baby bonding activities I have in my book, The Baby Bonding Book, is to repeat affirmations for your baby. Yes, I know he or she doesn’t understand the words…yet. But, because we’re all connected, they can feel your intent, and somewhere deep inside, they get the meaning. When you repeat phrases such as, “You are so beautiful and magnificent;” “You are perfect;” “You are bright and intelligent;” “You are so loving and generous;” “You are so creative and talented;” it’s like food for your baby’s soul. Repeating these phrases to your baby on a regular basis is like fertilizing the ground and watering the little shoots of life in your garden. Before long they’ll mature and blossom into something really magnificent.

Some of you might be saying to yourself right now, “Well I can certainly do that with my baby, but I sure wish it was done to me when I was a baby.” I know the feeling. Imagine what magnificent people we would be now if our parents had spent the time bonding with us completely and repeated affirmations to us like that while we were young. But we have to remember that we’re all human. None of us is a perfect parent. And we’re all doing the best we can with the understanding we have at the time. We need to forgive our parents and ourselves.

Also, we can give ourselves what our parents never did. We are beginning a new life with this new baby. We can begin a new life with ourselves as well by applying the following three ideas…

1. Love yourself unconditionally. Just as you love your baby pretty much unconditionally (in other words, he cries, throws up, gets cranky, refuses to go to sleep…but you still love him and think he’s wonderful) you can do this for yourself. Love yourself…unconditionally. Even when you blow your diet, think or say unkind things about others, file your taxes late, forget to call your mom, etc., etc., forgive yourself. You’re doing the best you can at any given moment. You have the chance to start again tomorrow. Think about how you love your baby and transfer that feeling to yourself. See yourself as a magnificent child of Infinite Love. Notice your wonderful qualities. Where are you proud of yourself? Where are you beautiful? Notice that and give yourself credit.

2. Treat yourself with kindness. Think about how you treat a new friend. Don’t you tend to give them the benefit of the doubt? Wouldn’t you be quick to recommend they treat themselves to something special whether it’s a good movie, a good book, a great restaurant, or a full-body massage? Treat yourself the same way. Act as if you were your own best friend.

3. Affirm a higher truth about yourself. Even if you are currently experiencing limitation in any area of your life, you have the capacity to rise above the experience and call forth a higher truth for your life. Even in the midst of a stressful time, a frustrating relationship, financial lack or a health issue, you can consciously connect with the abundance and harmony of the Universe and claim your good as a beloved child of the Divine. When it becomes yours in consciousness, it will become yours in experience shortly thereafter.

I go into much more detail and give you step-by-step processes for integrating these ideas (and more) into your life in my new program, the Manifesting Your Desires Platinum Program (to see video explaining how it works, click here http://www.manifestyourgood.com You have the ability to totally transform how you think about yourself and what shows up in your life as a result. This special time of nurturing your baby is the perfect time nurture yourself as well. Embrace the opportunity.

Many blessings to you and your baby, and the amazing life that’s in store for both of you!

Welcome!

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Victoria Loveland-CoenWelcome to my new blog!  Manifest Your Good is all about exploring the process of manifesting our heart’s desires.  We are using the Law of Attraction all the time.  Let’s learn to use it consciously and deliberately.  We “divinely-human” beings were given the gift of free will and dominion over our lives. We’ve just forgotten that fact.  We’ve mistakenly believed we were subject to the winds of fate, our history and our current experience.  Let us wake up together, rise above conditions and claim our divine birthright — peace, prosperity, love, success and wellbeing!