Complaining. It can feel pretty good to do in the moment. Ohhh, it feels so good to be right, even if it’s about something that’s wrong.  Unfortunately, it comes at a high price. It can cost you your peace of mind, your health, your friendships and your ability to create something better in your life. How can you see what’s possible if you’re always focusing on what’s in the way of your being happy? In addition, complaining…that’s the act of bitching and moaning about a condition or situation without doing anything to change it…puts you in the position of being a victim.  All of this is a pretty high price to pay for momentary satisfaction!

So, have you taken any steps to eliminate complaining from your life?  Have you tried wearing that purple, rubber bracelet from A Complaint Free World?  You know the one…every time you catch yourself complaining you’re supposed to switch it to the other wrist? That can be helpful for some. For others, it can be a good way to beat yourself up too. Maybe you’ve tried setting a personal intention and found a way to keep yourself accountable. Perhaps you’ve read book on it.  I’ve even seen a support group on Facebook to help eliminate complaining. As you can see, there are several ways to help break the negative spiral of complaining…some more effective than others.  I’d love to know what you’ve tried and what’s worked for you.

Perhaps the easiest way I know to break the complaining habit is through the process of proactive gratitude. Just the process of actively searching for things to be grateful for on a daily basis alone, shifts your perspective from one of seeing what’s wrong in the world to seeing what’s right in the world. So complaints no longer rush automatically to your mind and out of your mouth.  After practicing proactive gratitude for a time you’ll notice you are simply complaining much less (if you don’t your family or significant other will notice it.)

However, there will still be times something just gets your gall and it’s difficult to resist the urge.  Now, just to clarify, I’m not talking about those instances where there is something you can, in fact, change and you feel moved to speak your mind. That’s different.  I’m talking about those things you have no intention of trying to change; you just feel the need to complain about it.  So, here are 3 simple steps you can take to not only turn that complaint into gratitude, but completely shift your energy…

1.     Consider the condition, person or situation and just bite your lip for a moment (metaphorically, of course.)

2.    Take several deep breaths.

3.   Broaden your perspective for a moment and see if you can find something in the bigger picture that you can be grateful for…or an opportunity that wasn’t there before.

For example, I’m stuck in bad traffic…it’s not moving…and I’m late to an appointment. I might be tempted to curse and complain…loudly!  Okay, before I speak, I take a moment and breathe deeply a few times. Now I look at what opportunities might be inherent in this situation.  I have an opportunity of finishing that CD or radio program I’ve been listening too.  I have the opportunity of blessing everyone on the road…sending them loving thoughts.  I’m so grateful I have a cell phone and can call my appointment to let them know I’ll be late (I didn’t have that 10 years ago!) I can focus on the trees and bushes along the highway and really enjoy them. I’m so grateful for such beauty everywhere.

You see how you can come out of that situation a joyful, loving, positive person totally energized for your appointment?  Yeah.  This is the Gratitude Experiment. As always, let me know how this goes for you.